Odd Encounter

'Do you know where we are?' The enquirer was a middle aged man walking his Collie dog. 'Malham Tarn is just over there' I pointed to the southeast. 'Where are you heading?' I asked, thinking he might want some directions. 'Back to my car. But I'm not sure where I've parked it.' This seemed a bit of an odd reply. 'That's the way to Settle' I said, pointing down the road. 'I came up here in the thunder storms last night' he responded. I looked down at his Collie and he looked as confused as I probably did. I wished them both the best of luck and we sped off towards Malham Tarn House. The man followed behind us and so we sped faster.

Shelob's Lair

At Malham Tarn House we read an information board that said that the outhouse hosts some cave spiders, some of which are 7 centimetres across. The public toilet was only a few steps away and I wondered how many people had wandered into Shelob's Lair thinking it was a public convenience. 

The sun had come out now as we escaped the woodland and there was a grand view across the tarn. The Cabin Boy said that it was the biggest tarn she'd ever seen. A tarn by definition is a mountain lake. Malham Tarn seems more like a lake than a tarn since you don't get the feeling that you are actually at an elevation of 400 metres. We left the tarn behind and plodded along a grassy path towards Malham Cove.

Malham Cove Part 1

We sat down for a break on the eastern edge of Malham Cove and looked down on to the crazy paving of its western side. I could only see a couple of people wandering about. I'd never seen it so deserted. It was a fine view down the valley with the hazy outline of Pendle Hill visible on the horizon.

After our break, we headed off towards our next Dale's Wonder, Gordale Scar. We encountered a few walkers on the way across, but it was not what you would call 'busy.' A woman trundled by picking up litter and putting it in a plastic bag. We would see her later in the day, scouting around Malham Beck. 

I'd forewarned the Kapitan and Cabin Boy about the Goredale Refreshments lorry at the parking bay on the single track road. 'They offer beverages, ice creams and even hot pies' I'd informed them. They were both disappointed when we got down to the lorry only to find the owner was just putting some signs out to open up. It was already 11:30 which seemed a bit late for the bacon butty breakfast that the Kapitan had been anticipating. Instead of waiting we headed off towards Goredale Scar.

Goredale Scar

Goredale Scar is not just a natural wonder of Yorkshire, but of the UK as a whole. What a sight! There's nothing else like it. We joined other pilgrims at the alter of the large waterfall at the end of the massive, overhanging canyon. Everybody peered upwards above the initial waterfall, to the one above, where a couple of people looked down on us. It is possible to scramble up the waterfall and climb up the canyon to the hills above. In fact, there wasn't much water coming down the waterfall today and would have been an ideal day to do it. I suggested this to the Cabin Boy and was given such a scouring look that I instantly dismissed the idea. Both the Cabin Boy and the Kapitan were impressed with the approach though and seemed happy as we retreated back from the water dripping walls back into the warmth of the sun.

There is a quote about Goredale Scar on the information board at the start of the trail:

"...every object conspires to produce one of the grandest spectacles in nature. The rocks dart their bold and rugged fronts to the heavens, and impending fearfully over the head of the spectator, seem to threaten his immediate destruction."

Edward Dayes 1805

I think Mr Dayes sums the experience of visiting Goredale Scar, quite well.

Janet's Foss

Goredale Refreshments was fully open now, but was too busy for us to stop for a bacon butty and so we continued onwards to trail for Janet's Foss.

As the track descended to Janet's Foss we waited as about 20 walkers made their way up from the waterfall in a slow line. They seemed cheerful enough, but were obviously not in a hurry. Once down at the waterfall, I scrambled for a good photo position amongst its many admirers. A couple of women sat on nearby rocks and  were soaked from a swim in the tarn beneath the waterfall. It really is a splendid waterfall although I have seen it with more water coming down. I scrambled up the rocks to the Cabin Boy and Kapitan who then failed to warn me of the dog shite that I subsequently stood in. They guffawed like young children and so I stomped off down the trail, although much to my chagrin, it sounded more of a squelch than a stomp. The fields beyond the woodland were filled with yellow flowers and looked stunning as they contrasted with the green grass and blue sky. We made our way along the well trodden trail towards Malham.

Malham Cove Part 2

We had our lunch at one of the picnic tables in the Dales National Park carpark. There was an acoustic information machine that the Cabin Boy couldn't resist winding up and starting. It was so loud that two Jackdaws became startled and fell off a nearby bird feeder.

After lunch we made our way through Malham and along the way to the cove. As we walked by one house, I was surprised to find an elderly man sat on the floor at the front door entrance. At first I thought that he might have collapsed, but he had a mug of tea in one hand and so I presumed he was okay. We left the road and joined the track to the cove.  It was amazing how the huge craggy face gradually revealed itself. People looked like ants as they made away across its top. There are Perigrine Falcons nesting on the walls of the cove, but I didn't have my long lens and so I had no chance of spotting one. I had enough difficulties spotting the climber who was making his way up a western route. After getting stiff necks looking up at that enormous face, we headed off to make that steady plod up to the top of the cove.

Top Of The Cove

It is quite a plod too, although I find that it is easier to ascend than to come down the stone steps. After a significant effort we reached the top and started our progression across the limestone paving, a surface that never fails to astound me. Also astounding were the views across the cove and down into the valley. The Cabin Boy wasn't happy though. I don't know whether it was her blisters or the terrain. Maybe it was a combination of both. We hopped and skipped our way across to the centre of the cove and started off northwards, up the grassy track, along the stunning dry canyon to Comb Hill. As we climbed up the track, we met the same group of 20 or so ramblers that had significantly halted our progress down to Janet's Foss earlier in the day. We waited another 10 minutes for them all to pass now. We followed the Pennine Way path around Comb Hill and this provided a remarkable view back down the canyon towards Malham Cove. What a place! It was then only a 10 minute walk along grassy paths back to the carpark near Malham Tarn.

Farting Rucksack

My rucksack has developed a feature that it makes a farting noise when I take it off. I've tried to detect the cause of the noise, but without any success. Its occurrence of course provides much amusement to the Cabin Boy and the Kapitan. Back at Malham Tarn carpark, I took my rucksack off and sure enough there was an audible farting noise. Instantly the Cabin Boy and Kapitan started giggling, but much to my disdain the female half of an elderly couple, who were booting up at the car next door to us, heard it too. She gave an apologetic smile. I thought about explaining to her that it was my rucksack and not me, but I thought I might be digging myself into a bigger hole given the lack of support I'd expect to get from the Cabin Boy and the Kapitan. In the end, I just nodded apologetically at her blushing face as the Chuckle Brothers sniggered away. 

Despite my farting rucksack it had been an absolutely stunning day. Malham Tarn, Malham Cove, Goredale Scar and Janet's Foss; I defy anybody to come up with more natural wonders for such a short walk.